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Yesterday I asked my brother, ‘Will you be an executor of my will?’ He seemed surprised but agreed. My brother is a solicitor and I’m confident that he will manage all the necessary paper work and legal issues effectively.
‘Why not me?’ asks my mum with curiosity. It opens up a discussion about the reality that when I die, my mum will most likely already be dead, or in the event that I was to die before her, dealing with the practicalities of my death would be distressing for her.
Talking about this does feel scary – as if coming one step closer to the reality that one day I will die, that everyone I know will die, and that in the midst of the grief of loss there will be practicalities to be dealt with. I feel that making a will is a small way in which I can help those I care about during that difficult time after my death, by removing the added complications and confusion that arises when somebody dies without a will.
It is advised that we name two executors in our will. Often people will appoint their solicitor as one. Friends and family can be executors – but it makes sense to choose somebody younger than yourself. Executors should be someone that you trust, and that you consider capable of dealing with the practicalities when you die – it is their responsibility to carry out the instructions of your will.